It’s been 2085 days since Kingdom of Ash (KOA) was released and here I am, finally finished reading it. You’re probably wondering why it’s taken me so long to read this book? How can someone read the entire series and not want to know how it ends. When you love something so much, you don’t want it to end and that’s how I was with this series. This book literally stayed in the Barnes and Noble bag (along with the receipt) since I purchased it on October 23, 2018. I only took it out to take a selfie with it and then back in the bag it went. This also happened to be around the time where I made my exit from book reviewing/blogging and really, I had such a negative experience with reading that I didn’t read much for years. I’m talking of going from 150 books a year to maybe 5, if I was lucky. I loved my time as a book reviewer and running a blog; I met some amazing people along the way (both readers and authors) and I’m disappointed in myself for letting a lot of those relationships fade when I made my exit in the book world (my biggest regret, really). The pressure of reviewing books by a deadline and even feeling like I had to like a book that I was sent for review, even if I didn’t. I think that negative pressure is what did me in because most of the books I read, I truly enjoyed reading.
But let me get back to my love for Sarah J Maas’ (SJM) writing and specifically, Throne of Glass (TOG). I was first introduced to SJM at my very first BEA (Book Expo America) and I kept hearing people talk about this book but I wasn’t really familiar with it. I was able to get in to her signing line, met and got a copy of the book. She was super nice (and absolutely stunning) but I was excited I was able to get this book everyone was talking about. It was one of the first books I read when I got home and I understand the hype of it all. I was thrust in to this amazing world and amazing characters; I felt like I was actually right there in the story, with these characters. I just needed more. Sometimes, the hype is actually worth it. I instantly became a fan and started following her on social media and just waiting for the hardcover to be released (I’m a sucker for hardcovers).
Throughout the series, my love for her writing, these characters, this world…it only grew. My respect for SJM, as an author, as a person, only grew as the series went on (and as I was able to get to know her some and attend many events with her). I have so many fond memories during all those years, leading up to 2018; it was an incredible journey to witness (and be a part of, in the small capacity I did).
When Kingdom of Ash came out, I thought I was ready to find out how this story, how these characters, might come to an end but I realized, after taking that selfie, that I couldn’t do it. I wasn’t ready to see this story end, I was ready to learn of the fates of these characters. I just couldn’t do it. I feared the existence of my favorites character to cease to exist; whether it be through fictional death in the book or because their story has ended. The friendship they’ve formed, the bonds that were made; not just between the characters but between me and the characters. So, I let that book sit there, in that Barnes and Noble bag, collecting dust for 2085 days because I couldn’t do it. I wasn’t ready to let this series go.
It wasn’t until I decided to a buddy read with my friend and co-worker, Christina. She became a fan of SJM through A Court of Thorns and Roses (ACOTAR) and I knew if she liked that series, she would love TOG and so we started. I’ve never done a buddy read with a friend before and it was a wonderful experience, especially since I had read everything except KOA. Getting to see her reactions, her theories along the journey was incredible. I really struggled with reading this book because it was a lot, emotionally. I’m sure if you’re still reading this, you know exactly what I mean but Christina, god bless her, was a huge cheerleader. She knew it was hard (heck, she was experiencing the emotions, as well) but she kept encouraging me to read; we set a goal of 5 chapters a day and sometimes, I had trouble stopping at 5 and other, I had trouble even reading that. It took us 23 days to finish reading and instantly started writing this down, my feelings. I finished the day before Christina and both of us suffered an extreme book hangover. We just couldn’t believe it was over; these characters stories had come to an end and we wouldn’t look forward to learning more about them. I’ve never had this reaction to any series I’ve ever read before and I think that, alone, speaks volume’s for SJM’s writing and the impact she’s made on so many readers lives.
Thank you, Sarah. Thank you for writing this series, writing these characters, writing this world and just pulling me and never letting me go. I will forever be a TOG fangirl and I truly don’t believe any series will ever move me or connect with me on the level that this series has. I can’t even say ACOTAR did, while I love that series (and trust me, I love it), it doesn’t compare to TOG in my opinion. I am truly honored to be able to say that I’ve been a fan of yours from the very beginning; but more honored to have been able to share some of this journey with you, along the way. To have been able to call you a friend and show you unending support; as I always will.
To whatever end.
Thank you.
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